大发软件下载如何做出持久的改变?
试过Veganuary，但没有奶酪不行? 我试过干一月，但在和朋友们出去玩了一晚后失去了它? Want to make some changes in your life but don’t know how to make them stick? 也许心理学能帮上忙!
January is often a time when we really assess the year before 而且 think about how we may want to make changes in our life. It often seems to start out well - we tell all our friends 而且 family about our goals, 新年决心, 他们可能对大发软件下载的真实意图印象深刻. But 也许 around the middle of the month, 某物 else starts to happen. It gets harder 而且 harder or we get lured away by that tempting night out or late-night burger. 到这个月底, 你用闪亮的新健身卡已经三天了, or maybe you secretly had a bit of your flatmate’s cow’s milk in your tea when you ran out of almond milk. 失望开始出现, 而且 you might start to think that 也许 you aren’t able to make this change long term.
好吧, it probably doesn’t surprise you that researchers have been studying behaviour change 而且 features of change since the 1970s. In their research, they have found that there are some key points that are useful when making goals. We need to underst而且 some important factors in changing our behaviour in order to succeed.
Try to reflect on your own situation by thinking about the goals you have made but struggled to achieve. Having these situations in mind will help you to underst和 possible reasons for you not being about to make them stick. 让大发软件下载来看看制定目标时的四个关键要素:
正确的时间做出正确的改变
“这是一个漫长的到来，但我知道，改变将会到来”
山姆库克
The first question you might want to ask yourself is ‘Do I have the resources I need to make this change in my life?’
太频繁了, people set out with 好 intentions for the changes they want to make but have not thought about what they will need in order to make those changes. 例如, maybe you set out to go to the gym 5 times a week 而且 train for a half marathon. 理论上，这是一个很好的目标, 但如果你决定在考试季中间做这件事呢, 同时也同意两班倒?
That’s a tough time to set yourself such a huge goal 而且 you might be better off planning it for another time, 或者设定一个更可行的目标——也许做一个 每周parkrun 也许?
让你的目标符合你的价值观
“人生的成功意味着按照自己的价值观生活”
Russ Harris, ACT(接受与承诺疗法)创始人
你想让你的生活代表什么? 你知道价值观和目标不是一回事吗? A value is more likely to be a more long-st而且ing principle that guides us 而且 that we would like to uphold, 而目标是你想要实现的东西. 简单地说，你实现了目标，但你 生活的 你的价值观.
这对你有什么作用? One example might be if having strong bonds 而且 friendships is one of 你的价值观, then it may be necessary for you to reflect on how to maintain these relationships. 例如, you might practice daily compassion towards others 而且 yourself 而且 develop personal qualities such as tolerance 而且 patience. Your motivation is far more likely to increase if the goal suitably matches your value.
想知道你的价值观是什么? 看一看 Russ Harris博士的网站
你想要做出改变的潜在障碍
“大发软件下载就是大发软件下载一直在等待的变化.”
巴拉克•奥巴马(Barack Obama)
做出持久的改变可能会在大发软件下载的生活中产生连锁反应, 也许 friends 而且 family will feel the impact of you choosing to study more, 戒酒或增加锻炼. Think about how you can recruit the people in your life to be supportive 而且 help them underst而且 why you want to make the change 而且 how it might benefit them too (for instance: you might be a happier, 周围压力小的人).
Not allowing the people around you to underst而且 your changes might create barriers; your mates might feel disappointed when you aren’t drinking with them, 这会给你更多压力，让你屈服，喝上几杯.
你如何从目标的反复或失败中恢复过来
“Dripping water hollows out stone, not through force but through persistence.”
奥维德
有时大发软件下载压力大的时候会吃东西, 有时，当大发软件下载度过紧张的一天时，大发软件下载喜欢喝一两杯, 有时, 当大发软件下载遇到困难的时候，大发软件下载只是想狂看盒装电影，放松一下. 所有这些都可能发生在大发软件下载试图“做好”的时候. 旧病复发有时是改变的一部分. Becoming aware of these might help you plan for how to build them in to your goal (you might decide to be a flexitarian, 有时吃肉，但主要是素食主义者). Or you might have some motivational quotes to help get you back on track should you cave 而且 have that night out with friends rather than study.
所有这些例子中的关键技能都是自我意识和理解. It is only when we know ourselves that we can underst而且 what goals will be useful for us to implement 而且 what barriers we need to overcome.
Think about how you can incorporate the goals into your daily life so that the change becomes longer lasting 而且 more effective. 小的改变更容易融入大发软件下载的生活
Remember that in order for 某物 to become a habit, you need to do 某物 at least 30 times.
在设定目标时，一个有用的技巧是遵循SMART规则.
SMART代表:
S ——具体
你每天晚上准备学习多长时间? 你能制定一个可行的学习计划吗? 当你感觉不舒服的时候，你能制定一个备用计划吗?
M ——可测量的
你怎么知道你的目标是否有效? If you aren't getting better grades or are still struggling with deadlines, 然后你应该能够看到这一点，并想出一个新的行动计划. 保持目标的灵活性和可测量性会帮助你实现它们.
A ——可以实现的
你觉得这真的可行吗? 你真的能做到每周去健身房5次吗? 有没有另一个目标仍然让你觉得你在做 某物 好? 也许从每周去健身房3次开始更现实.
R -与你的人生目标相关
Like with values, does your goal fit in with your immediate or long-term life plan? 否则，这可能会影响你的动力，导致自我毁灭. Perhaps 你的价值观 are around being sociable, getting healthy 而且 keeping finances in 好 order. 加入一个昂贵的健身房可能不是一个明智的目标. 你可能只会对花费感到不满而不去. You might find it more beneficial to your joint values to find a goal for exercise that is sociable 而且 cost effective.
T ——基于时间的
你希望什么时候发生这种变化? 改变需要多长时间? 它需要被分解成更小的部分吗? 例如, 如果你正在考虑素食主义，但这是一个很大的变化, 为什么不从一开始就考虑不吃肉呢? 然后你就可以判断这个目标是否符合你的价值观.
结论
In summary, being self-aware 而且 following these simple guides will help you stick to your goals. 正如玛雅·安杰洛所写的:“踏上一条崭新的道路是困难的, 但并不比保持现状更困难"所以, 试试零钱，看看你做得如何.
记得:
- 让目标对你有意义
- 使用SMART目标技巧
- 把目标融入到你的日常生活中
- 和朋友一起玩
大发软件下载失败或无法坚持目标的原因有:
- 目标可能不现实
- We may feel overwhelmed by the amount of change we have set ourselves up for
- 大发软件下载可能缺乏实现目标的动力
- 大发软件下载身边的人可能没有大发软件下载所需要的那么多支持
- 你可能还没有准备好改变
Tanya Carpenter博士 而且 海伦·尼古拉斯博士 lecture in the 心理学院 at the 大发软件下载官网 at an undergraduate 而且 postgraduate level including the MSc咨询, 临床心理学理学士 和 咨询心理学理学士.
All views expressed in this blog are the Academic’s own 而且 do not represent the views, policies or opinions of the 大发软件下载官网 or any of its partners.